Professions of a Dangerous Mind

What would you do if you met a chemist? Kill it, run from it, feed it warm cookies and milk? Whatever you do don't get into a philosophical argument with it. Chemists deal with scales and numbers of things that are entirely outside the realm of normal human existence. When the number of something becomes extraordinarily large, the probability of seemingly impossible things goes up. This makes it rather possible for chemists to observe phenomena that are quite strange. For instance, the probability of any molecule to accumulate enough kinetic energy to burst its way out of the system is tiny. However, when you have 602,200,000,000,000,000,000,000 molecules, or one Mole as chemists call it, then there will be molecules escaping all over the place. If you have a rock on a beach, there is a probability that it will somehow accumulate enough energy among all of its molecules to shoot into outer space completely at random, defying gravity. However gravity and the friction of air and many other factor such as other obstacles get in its way, and the rocks on the beach tend to sort such that the largest rocks are in the area of greatest wave energy and the smaller ones will accumulate in areas right at the border where the waves can no longer affect them. Now, there is no particular reason why one rock comes incontact with one particular region of water, it is acting in a random way. But not totally random, it is controlled randomness. It seems silly to assume that any rock will ever spontaneously jump into space, but a chemist argues that it is thermodynamically possible.
So what about life? It seems astronomically improbable that anything as complex as a human being, or even an amoeba could randomly assemble itself. But then there's that issue of a system again. In this case, the system actually helps create the complex organism. If the building blocks of life are created, then one might think that it would be random for them to assemble themselves. Initially it would be. But some compounds would be able to affect the probability that more of that compound would be made. Bingo! Reproduction: Life. Random variation generated in these compounds would result in differential reproductive success, the very essence of evolution by natural selection. It is by this method that a complex organism can be created.
Just so you know, this little lesson was spawned by a discussion with a chemist about a Japanese toy robotic cat. The chemist claimed that it would be possible for that cat to spontaneously Asimov somewhere in the universe. Okay, in a universe that is infinite in time and space and matter, this might be possible. Of course the chemist points out that the universe is only infinite in space. The chemist argues his points so ardently that he even compares the formation of the cat to that of life. The probability of that cat assembling is far smaller than that of life. Its possible but not probable. Of course, robot cats exist, so one might also argue that it was by the sum of naturally selective processes acting on random chance that the cat was in fact assembled. Hmmm, if he weren't dead, I wonder what Douglas Adams would have to say on the matter.
So just remember, if you happen to meet a chemist, don't argue with it. It does not bear a pragmatic view of the universe. It will use its knowledge of semantics to its advantage and nothing will actually be accomplished by arguing with it.