money better spent

The following is a form letter that I would like to see be used someday by a would-be political candidate. They can check which ever box they like. I don't think that hopes for such a letter are realistic, but it's a nice hope.

Dear Contributor,
I realize that it must seem like I've taken your money under false pretences, but rather than spend the tens of millions that I've raised on advertising, lobbying and otherwise running for office, I've decided to drop out of the race and indstead use the money to:

[] plant a million trees.
[] found a library/ museum/ school/ zoo/ performing arts center/large public park.
[] create a large planned community for low income individuals and families.
[] create an endowment for the arts and sciences that gives out over a million dollars a year from the interest and never runs out of money.
[] turn a section of northern/ equitorial rainforest into a wildlife preserve.
[] buy solar pannels/ wind turbines to power 5 thousand homes.
[] actually fund the social programs that I said I'd fund if I took office.
[] give out over a billion condoms to people around the world.
[] give out (favorite virus here) vaccines in developing nations.
[] build a new prison.
[] Grant the wishes of nearly a million terminally ill children over the next several years.
[] nearly double alternative energy research spending for a year.
[] create an endowment that supports law enforcement.
[] give one million people food for a week that wouldn't have otherwise gotten it.
[] actually save an endangered species.
[] have another self enriched food created like vitamin A rice.
[] have garbage removed from close to a thousand miles of coast line.

Thank you for helping me acheive this powerful act of good for the world.
Sincerely,
A former candidate for office

Attention Impulse Shoppers

Besides food, rent and gasoline, the thing that I spend the most money on by far is books. I have no problem checking books out of the library when available, but more often than not, I prefer the out of print, poorly known, and ultimately somewhat rare books that one doesn't find at any but the best libraries. Below is an example of the books that I've purchased recently:

Osteology of the Reptiles by Alfred Sherwood Romer
Atlas of Invertebrate Macrofossils by John Murray
Ends of the Earth by Roy Chapman Andrews
Good Omens by Neil Gaiman and Terry Pratchet
Florida's Fossils by Robin C Brown
Fossiling in Florida by Mark Renz
Splendid Isolation by George Gaylord Simpson
The Dechronization of Sam Magruder by George Gaylord Simpson
Dinosaurs and other Mesozoic Reptiles of California by Richard P. Hilton
Evolution of Herbivory in Terrestrial Vertebrates edited by Hans-Dieter Sues
Systematics and Morphology of American Mosasaurs by Dale A. Russell
Coastal Process and Engineering Geology of San Diego by the San Diego Association of Geologists
Anonymous Rex & Casual Rex by Eric Garcia
Lake Wobegone Summer 1956 by Garrison Keillor
Cannery Row by John Steinbeck
Tortilla Flats by John Steinbeck
A Log From the Sea of Cortez by John Steinbeck
The Pearl by John Steinbeck

There are others that I'll probably get just as soon as I find an acceptable price; perhaps below 10 cents per page. Furthermore, I'll admit that all the Steinbeck novels at the end are available at most libraries, but I was on the road and in need of something to read when I bought three of the four of them. On the other hand, I'm sure that this is all just an extension of my compulsion to collect things and adorn my home with them the way a hermit crab sticks bits of lichen to the shell it inhabits. Besides though, who ever heard of a hermit that wasn't well read.
As an afterthought and as I've said before, in the event of my passing, my library is to remain intact and shall not be dispersed under penalty of severe beating by a zombie paleontologist.

He Says He's Not Dead!

I appologize for the lack of posts lately. I've been without internet service for a little while, but now I'm back and I should be posting a few wildly interesting posts to compensate for my absesnce. I think that a 3 page essay on the biological implications of the origin of various forms of patriotism should bring back a few readers. Or perhaps an investigative report on mustaches, the growing threat. Maybe even an expose on Snapple and the tin infused apples that are damaging teeth around the country. If you'd like to ready any of these posts, press 1 now. It won't do anything on my end, but hopefully you'll feel slightly empowered by it.